


Dark, Light and the Shadows Between

by Narutos Mother (momhuey)



Category: Naruto
Genre: Drama, Friendship and romance, M/M, Naruto is a sage, Naruto is an excellent ninja, Possible non-con, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Uchiha Massacre, Uchiha Sasuke Returns to Konoha
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-23
Updated: 2015-05-23
Packaged: 2018-03-31 19:35:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3990163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/momhuey/pseuds/Narutos%20Mother
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Last of the migrations from ff.net.  As always, my stories have meaning to me.  The theme here is needing help and not knowing it.  </p><p>I had posted this with an epilogue; many people loved it, many people did not.  I am going to put it in the End Notes for anyone who wants to venture forth.</p><p>Also, one may consider a couple of scenes to be non-con.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dark, Light and the Shadows Between

**~~~~~~~Divide~~~~~~~**

Tsunade's eyes widened and her arms fell to her sides as the door to the emergency ward was kicked open…again.

"Would someone please tell me what the  _hell_  is going on?" she yelled as Shikamaru, with a disgusted grunt, dumped a nearly unconscious, very bruised and bloody ninja onto the floor. He gave the groaning chunin an uncharacteristically aggravated shove with his booted foot before straightening and wiping his bloody hands on his pants.

"Nara!" Tsunade snapped as he turned to leave.

He turned back, an annoyed look on his face.

"I asked a question," she ground out. She pointed to the newest patient leaving slimy red puddles on her floor. "What's the story with this one?"

Shikamaru shrugged. "Fighting."

"With you?"

"Certainly not," he snorted derisively. "I imagine Kakashi will be dumping the other useless carcass here shortly." He looked thoughtful. "Or maybe not. He's pretty pissed. You might want to dispatch a team of nin-dogs to the Forest of Death in case he…"

"Nara!" She snapped again. After a deep breath, she rubbed her face. "What's going on? Why are our ninja beating the shit out of each other?"

He continued to look at the drooling lump on the floor angrily then sighed.

"Hell if I know. Maybe you can figure it out." He looked at her. "If you want more information, be at the Bloody Kunai at ten tonight." He looked her up and down. "Come incognito."

"A bar?"

Just then an explosion could be heard from across town.

"Mother fucking, immature, stupid…," Shikamaru growled, his eyes closed. When a blood curdling scream floated through the window he looked at her with eyes blazing. Ignoring protocol, he poked an aggravated finger in her direction.

"Ten o clock! Be there!" The he flew out the door.

+++

Even though she was the undisputed queen of the henging arts, Tsunade was pretty sure at least three people in the bar saw through her disguise as a bent, bewhiskered, old man slouched in a corner chair.

Of course, Nara was expecting her, but the twinkle in Kakashi's eye as he studied her gave her pause. Perverted as Kakashi was, she didn't think he was hitting on her in her current form. And Iruka was a nervous wreck casting anxious glances between her and a couple of the other patrons in the bar; namely Uzumaki Naruto and Uchiha Sasuke.

God damn, but the atmosphere in here could be carved up with a knife. There was such an air of suspense; like watching a fuse burn down to an explosion. The room was packed and the occupants might as well have been wearing team jerseys; one side blue, the other orange, as the sides just glared at each other in tense silence.

Not everyone was perched on the razor's edge of confrontation. She could tell that a fair number of ninja, Iruka, Kakashi, Shikamaru, Sakura, Neji and Lee, were there to try to avert disaster.

As for Sasuke, he sat at his table, watered down drink in hand, staring morosely at melting ice cubes. His unhappiness radiated off him in waves. He seemed completely oblivious to the sycophantic gathering of groupies on his side of the room.

Across the room at the bar, was Naruto. Naruto shouldn't even be there; he was on a mission. She studied him carefully. A clone? It had to be, but damned if it wasn't the most amazing clone she'd ever seen with heft and weight, completely indistinguishable from the real thing.

He was a mirror of Sasuke, slumped miserably over a drink that he was clearly not drinking. He was surrounded by his closest friends but was ignoring all of them. She could feel his focus on the brunet across the room, though he hadn't looked at him once.

The ninja in the Sasuke camp seemed very juvenile, sitting on the edges of their seats, watching Naruto. They poked each other and made faces across the room.

Naruto's friends seemed more a pack of bodyguards. They ignored the occasional taunts in favor of watching their friend with sympathetic looks.

Tsunade watched this for an hour, coming to understand the escalation of violence in Konoha. These two groups wanted to tear each other apart.

She just had no idea why.

Finally Sasuke sighed, threw some money on the table, stuffed his hands in his pockets and shuffled out the door.

Naruto's clone slumped onto the bar in absolute relief. Then he gathered himself, threw money on the bar as well and turned toward the door.

Choji grabbed his arm. "Naruto…"

Naruto looked anxiously back and forth between Choji and the door.

"I have to go."

"This isn't the way."

"What is the way?" He pulled on his arm, his voice taking on a panicked note.

"I…" Choji slumped. "I don't know but, if you'd just tell us…"

Sakura rushed up and threw her arms around the broad torso, wetting his shirt with her tears.

"I know, sweetie," Naruto murmured, smoothing her hair back. "I gotta go though."

"Naruto, please tell me…"

"No. It's not mine to tell." He kissed her forehead, then pulled free and left in a rush.

Tsunade was trying to make her way to Kakashi and Iruka when the distinct sounds of another fight could be heard from outside.

She kept her disguise intact and joined the growing crowd watching the fight brewing outside.

"He is such a fucking pussy," one young chunin screamed at another equally young chunin.

"Shut your fucking hole! You don't know anything. He's the best ninja in this pathetic village!"

"Uchiha-san kicked his ass four times this month, you loser."

"I told you to shut your mouth before I shut it for you! If you didn't have your head so far up Uchiha's ass, you'd see that Naruto-san lets Uchiha win."

The other snorted. "You are either a complete retard or," his eyes took on a malevolent glint, "or maybe you'd like something up  _your_  ninja's ass…like maybe… _your dick_!

The other ninja howled in rage and launched himself at his smirking foe.

Tsunade waited for her jounin to break up the fight, and Iruka made a tentative step forward, but Kakashi held his arm, pulling a small orange book out of his pocket.

The two teens were panting bloody messes and one had finally pulled a sword, ready to move beyond 'difference-settling' to murder when Kakashi finally released Iruka.

Tsunade moved to his side. "What's going on?"

His look was surprisingly serious. "I don't know. Naruto isn't talking. And of course Sasuke isn't talking either."

"Naruto's leaving clones here?"

Kakashi raised a brow. "That was a clone?"

"Naruto's been out of town for over a week."

Kakashi looked thoughtful. "I'll be damned." He nodded. "Naruto's watching him for something."

The smell of smoke reached them and they sighed in unison as a blaze could be seen glowing in the night sky.

"Feel free to join the show tomorrow. There are nightly performances."

And Kakashi vanished.

The next two nights were repeat performances, identical to the first, the only difference the second night being that Naruto had returned from his mission and shown up in person.

The third night seemed to be progressing the same, except the tension was less; boredom had taken the edge of most tempers.

Then out of nowhere, Naruto slapped his hand on the counter and stood.

Every nerve in the place stretched to the limit at this signal.

Neji grabbed Naruto's arm. "Naruto…"

The anxiety Tsunade felt rolling off the blond was at complete odds with the angry look on his face.

Naruto looked at his friend for a second. Neji finally sighed and dropped his head.

"At least take it outside."

Naruto gave a short nod and pulled free, stalking over to Sasuke's table.

"What the fuck are you looking at, Uchiha?"

Sasuke raised his head and blinked several times at Naruto. Tsunade had the distinct impression that he wasn't all there.

"Wha…" He wasn't right. There was a hint of something in the chakra she felt across the room. Something…familiar… Then she noticed the cursed seal markings peaking out of the top of his high-necked shirt. Orochimaru. And his eyes… More than just the activation of the Sharingan. The tomoes were spinning out of sync with each other. .

Naruto grabbed his arm and jerked him to his feet.

"I asked you why the fuck you were staring at me."

Comprehension and clarity slowly transformed Sasuke's face. Then anger…

"Why the hell do you do this, loser? Do you have a masochistic side that just likes to have the shit beat out of you?"

"And who's gonna do it? You?" Naruto barked a harsh laugh and poked Sasuke in the chest with a thick finger.

"Don't poke me," Sasuke snarled. Tsunade felt his ire rise and as it increased, the strange fluctuations in his chakra seemed to level out.

Naruto poked him again. This time when Sasuke's tomoes flared, they were symmetrical and a clear result of his own will.

Naruto stared at Sasuke another moment, and Tsunade had the sense that he was assessing the other shinobi. Then he clenched his jaw and poofed them from the room.

The tumult within the bar was insane as several people shouted to each other. "Where are they?" "Shut up. I'm trying…" "Shit, where did they…" "They're not…" "The training grounds!"

When Tsunade arrived at the training grounds, nearly every stump and tree branch was draped with cheering and booing residents, ninja and civilian alike.

And the fight was on.

Sasuke was beyond furious. He was so angry that tears were mixing with the sweat on his face.

Naruto was more calculating. To the more advanced ninja, it was clear that Naruto was performing a dance, letting Sasuke lead. He gave just enough and was exactly where he needed to be to let Sasuke burn through whatever was going on with him. Even when Sasuke's anger made him sloppy, Naruto was at the end of his fist, or within reach of his foot.

Finally Sasuke brought up Chidori. Tsunade watched the flames on his neck recede completely at this drain in chakra.

She realized her hand was being crushed and looked over and saw Sakura with a look of anguish on her tear stained face.

The clearing fell into silence and they both held their breaths as Naruto's body jerked and twitched from the electricity coursing through it.

Sasuke stood over Naruto in a silence broken only by the crackling of residual lightening on and around the heaving, wincing blond.

"Stop doing this!" Sasuke yelled down at him.

Naruto looked up from his position sprawled in the dirt. After a moment, he closed his eyes and turned his head away.

Sasuke's face contorted in rage and he howled at the sky, his fists clenched at his side. Then he poofed out of the clearing.

Before anyone could move, Naruto was gone as well.

**~~~~~~~Sasuke~~~~~~~**

Sasuke sat on his bathroom floor amid scattered first aid supplies. There was nothing in the assortment, however, to heal his pain.

Tears dripped from his chin as anguish tore through him.

Fuck! His life was a mess. And his future was… A choked sound left him. He couldn't think about his future.

Eight months ago, he'd never thought his life could actually get worse. He'd sat next to Orochimaru's body for a full day really looking inside himself for the first time in years.

Suddenly, or perhaps not so suddenly, when Orochimaru wanted to do the transfer, Sasuke hadn't wanted to die. Why? What did it all mean? What did he want?

He'd thought of his brother and realized that what he'd wanted more than revenge was answers. The massacre was a giant hole inside him that the death of his brother could not fill. Indeed, he'd realized, it would only make the hole bigger, and ultimately, impossible to ever fill. And he'd had this sense that, without understanding Itachi's actions and rushing headlong based on suggestions and manipulations of others, he was likely dancing to other people's tunes.

He may well end up having to mete out punishment to Itachi someday, but he no longer felt the single-minded rush to do so. He needed more information, some sort of understanding. It was going to mean stepping out of his isolation and maybe asking for help from someone he could trust.  _Naruto…_

_Naruto…_

Naruto had been a large part of that night-long vigil. Now that he let himself think beyond training, vengeance and the self-preservation that came with living in Orochimaru's twisted, perverted and violent environment, he admitted that he'd missed his best friend terribly.

Amidst the calming sounds of the night, he remembered laughter and playing. He remembered shared dreams of the future; children's dreams of becoming great ninja, of becoming heroes. He remembered caring again. And he remembered sudden bursts of …love? Blazing, reason-obliterating emotions that materialized as selfless actions within a prison of mirrors. Memories…possibilities…

Even sitting there in the dark chill of night next to a rotting corpse, Sasuke's mind filled with sunshine and peace.

What did he want from his friend? They were just vague concepts to him, but if he'd had to put names to them, they would be 'home,' 'family,' 'belonging.' And 'lover?' Another vague concept, but foulmouthed Sound shinobi and the occasional accidental wrong turn down a secluded hallway, indeed once or twice his own deliberate wrong turn down a secluded hallway, had given him the general mechanics, if not the heart of such a concept.

Would Naruto want something like that? The odds didn't seem very good; observation told him that, biologically speaking, his preference was not the norm. Still, there had always been…something…between them.

As morning had come that day three seasons ago, he realized that he didn't care. There was only one person on the face of the earth that cared about him and he'd take whatever that person would give him. He wanted to go home.

He'd find a new purpose. Put his body and mind to work for a worthier goal, become part of a new community, using his skills protecting and supporting families and comrades, joining his hands with others, shopkeepers, mothers, teachers to make a village, a home.

Warmth had surrounded him and stayed with him through the long walk to Konoha, cooling only slightly throughout his first week back and the uncertainties that came with interrogations and decisions about his status.

Naruto had not been there. Hokage-sama had taken pity on him and informed him that Naruto was on a mission, that Naruto was gone on missions a lot. He had a sense that she'd thought she'd said too much when she let slip that maybe Naruto would choose to stay home more now that Sasuke…

Then the warmth that had sustained Sasuke had receded completely and chill invaded his very bones the minute he'd stepped through the gates of his childhood home.

It had taken only one day and one night before Sasuke had returned to the tower and begged to be assigned to a team. Acknowledging that he was a still a genin, he agreed to take anything she'd be willing to give. The next day, he'd left Konoha once again as part of Nara Shikamaru's three man cell.

When he got back, he learned that he'd missed Naruto. The blond had come and gone again. This continued for a while until Sasuke found himself with a two week rotation of downtime. It was the beginning of the end.

Christ, he hated every inch of this property that used to be his home. Anxiety gripped him, his heart raced and his stomach quivered every time he turned a corner or opened a door. He didn't believe in ghosts but he did think that he was maybe losing his fucking mind.

He was having nightmares, hallucinations and he suspected, blackouts; stretches of time that were just blank.

But the worst part was Naruto. The blond had come back from a mission and had left again without coming to see him.

That's when the  _other_  dreams had started. Dreams of affection, of love. Dreams of sleeping wrapped in Naruto's arms. Dreams of pleasure. As these dreams invaded his waking thoughts, he yearned for a connection that never came.

It was five months before he actually came face to face with Naruto. He'd been on guard duty at the gates when Naruto trudged up, filthy and exhausted. Sasuke'd been surprised when Naruto had come right up to him and looked him in the eyes. He seemed to be searching for answers.

Hurt welled in Sasuke and he'd snapped. "What the fuck are you looking at?"

Naruto's expression had closed off but he still just stood there.

"How are you?" Naruto had finally asked.

"What the fuck do you care?"

"Sasuke…"

"Five months. Five fucking months you've been avoiding me." Sasuke was ashamed of the needy emotions surging through his chest, pushing up his throat, threatening to erupt as tears.

"Sasuke…"

"What, loser?"

Naruto had opened and closed his mouth a couple of times then just clenched his jaw and pressed his lips into a tight line.

"Stay away from me," Sasuke bit out irrationally, his heart screaming for just the opposite. "I don't want or need anything from you."

Naruto had turned and left.

But things had continued to deteriorate even further.

Sasuke was seeing Naruto everywhere. Even when he knew the idiot was gone on missions. His image was lurking around corners of his property and Sasuke was still dreaming of the blond.

Sasuke was coming to realize that the property was a problem in his life and when he was not on missions, he began spending as little time there as possible. For the last months he was finding himself at the bar every evening. It was always full of people and more importantly, his blond was always there as well.

Sitting in the same room as Naruto, who was also clearly unhappy, night after night Sasuke took the time to think. It occurred to him that he'd been wrong. After all he'd been the one to leave, trying to break his bond with Naruto by pain of Chidori. He recalled the sickening feel of cool air brushing blood slicked knuckles as they stuck out Naruto's back. Sasuke knew that he was the one who needed to do some groveling.

He'd been pondering this for a couple of days when everything changed again.

Finding trouble concentrating, he'd been nursing his drink feeling kind of sick, his stomach churning as his drink started to smell like blood, when out of nowhere, Naruto had yanked him out of his seat and smacked him across the face. He'd been fighting a debilitating headache, his ears ringing and his skin hurting and so Naruto had managed to hit him twice more before he got his bearings.

They'd fought, destroying nearly every piece of furniture in the bar, until Naruto was finally in an unmoving sprawl across an overturned table.

This scenario had played out a dozen times since then, Naruto attacking him out of the blue and Sasuke experiencing an otherworldly rage, beating the blond to a pulp.

It was clear; Naruto hated him. This village hated him. Being spat upon was not a completely uncommon occurrence the last weeks.

He had no one. No home. No dreams. No future worth thinking about. Where could he go at this point? What could he do?

As he sat in his bathroom and, even now, felt the presence of the boy he'd loved and wronged and loved and wronged again, he wished he had the courage to just end it all.

**~~~~~~~Naruto~~~~~~~**

Naruto, his chakra masked, sat on the roof of Sasuke's house and cried.

How had the situation come to this? He knew it was his fault. He'd made choices and decision on his own, in the heat of moments, and maybe they hadn't been the right ones.

How the hell was he supposed to know what to do? For years, his decisions were simple; kill or be killed, spare an enemy for interrogation or kill him on the spot, sleep or keep moving, clones or toad katas. Safety… decisions about the preservation of flesh. Never, ever something like this; never preservation of a heart; of a friendship.

How the hell did he fix this at this point?

He remembered coming home from a mission all those months ago to learn that Sasuke had come home. He'd just barely managed to make it through debrief and get the door to his apartment shut behind him before he'd burst; joy and terror, warring upheavals that found their way to the surface as shaky sobs.

Finally, he'd gotten himself together. He'd cleaned up and, pocketing a scratched and frayed forehead protector…a piece offering…he'd made his way to Sasuke's home.

Getting no response at the door, he'd wondered briefly if the bastard was mission bound again and had sent his chakra out. What he found was...odd. The presence he'd felt was Sasuke's, but it was…wrong.

Naruto found Sasuke in the kitchen. He was balled up in a fetal position under the table, whimpering and crying, his teeth chattering. As Naruto dove under the table and pulled Sasuke into his arms, scanning frantically for an attacker, he could feel absolute terror coming from his teammate.

"Sasuke!" The brunet reeked. He'd pissed himself and fear oozed from him in an acrid mix of sweat and hormones.

Finally having ascertained that they were alone in the house, Naruto gripped Sasuke's head and tried to establish eye contact. He recognized the black markings creeping up his neck and across his face from the cursed seal, but his eyes scared Naruto. They made Sasuke look demented. The tomoes spun out of sync with each other and the irises flickered back and forth between black and red.

"The blood," Sasuke keened. "Don't kill me," he panted, then sobbed, "Kill me, please kill me."

"Sasuke," Naruto whispered.

"Okaasan…Otoosaaaaan…"

Naruto's heart broke. Sasuke was having a flashback and the seal on his neck had taken him out of the reach of any form of reality. He held Sasuke tight and talked, trying to reach some rational part of his friend.

After what felt like agonizing centuries, Sasuke had finally slumped and stared, unblinking in some catatonic state. Naruto knew he wasn't back yet, though, because the flames were still prominent on the pale skin of his neck.

Dear god, his poor friend. What was this? How often did it happen? Did anyone else know about it?

Naruto picked him up and took them both into the shower. He gently washed the sickness and urine from his friend, put him in a clean pair of boxers and tucked him into bed.

He stood by the bedside for a time, watching Sasuke stare unseeing at the ceiling. He didn't want to leave him like this, but there was this niggling thought that feared how Sasuke would react to knowing how Naruto had found him. Pride and dignity had been a foundational part of their childhood relationship.

Finally caving to his deeper yearnings, he crawled into bed with Sasuke and pulled him close. He carded his fingers through drying midnight strands, brushed his lips over the clenched jaw and traced nonsense patterns on knotted back muscles until finally Sasuke was lying limp and breathing evenly.

Naruto had stayed like that for hours. The sun had gone and come again and still Sasuke slept. The brunet had slipped into a normal sleep at some point and had wrapped himself around Naruto.

Naruto had learned several things lying there, his arms full. He'd learned that he'd missed his best friend terribly. He'd pushed it out of his thoughts the last few years, but now it rushed to the forefront of his mind and he didn't know if he could live without Sasuke again now that he was back.

He also learned that he wanted Sasuke. His body was completely out of his control and a yearning for the taste and feel of the pale flesh hammered at him. The heat and smell, the sound of a steady heartbeat and the feel of hard muscles and smooth skin made Naruto clench his fists against fine tremors in his limbs.

But was reminded of something he already knew, that he'd give his life to protect this bastard. He'd do anything to keep this person alive and happy, to give him this home that he'd come back to.

That included protecting his heart and dignity. He tried to imagine the various outcomes of Sasuke waking and finding himself draped over Naruto. And if Sasuke remembered the state he'd been in when Naruto had found him the day before… Without exception every scenario he envisioned was all bad. He needed to get out of here before Sasuke woke up.

So he'd left and had had to leave on his next mission before he could see Sasuke again. Before he'd left, he'd pulled Sakura aside.

"Hey sweetie, I hear Sasuke's back," he’d said.

"Yes." She'd smiled with genuine happiness.

"How is he?"

"Great. Adjusting. Jumped right into teamwork. Spends a lot of time out in public."

Making a quick decision, Naruto had pulled a scroll out of his pouch, performed some hand seals and gave it to her.

"Ya know, if…anything…if he…" He scratched his head. "If you need me for…anything, you can open this and I'll get the message no matter where I am."

"Naruto?" Her smile slipped.

"Just…keep an eye on him."

It just got weirder after that.

The next time Naruto got back, he knew something was wrong with Sasuke before he'd even passed the gates. He felt an irrational stab of anger that he was the only sage in Konoha. How the hell did a village function with only one?

He'd rushed straight to the Uchiha district and found another disaster. Sasuke was once again caught in the events of the past and had destroyed his living room. He was cut up from broken glass and was lying in a growing pool of blood.

Naruto had sprung into action, trying to reach his friend with touches and words. While a team of clones righted the living room, he'd peeled filthy clothes off the soaking, shivering body and started picking glass and wood splinters out of icy skin.

Then he had an idea. It had never occurred to him before because his missions were always solo, but he wondered now if he couldn't extend his healing ability into another body. Theoretically it should be possible. And so Naruto had learned a new skill that night, invading Sasuke's body with a mix of his and Kyuubi's chakra, healing the cuts and bruises.

There had been a rather alarming side effect to this. Flames still prominently adorning his left side, Sasuke had gasped and gotten a raging hard-on sitting there on the edge of the bed.

Naruto had been stunned when Sasuke had tackled him to the floor and proceeded to try to merge them at the cellular level. He growled and howled and tried to eat the skin off Naruto's face and lips. All the while he ground his lower half frantically into Naruto's crotch.

It was violent and quick and Sasuke was once again scratched and abraded from the coarse fabric, buckles and hooks on Naruto's uniform.

After Naruto's mind cleared from his own earth moving orgasm, he saw that Sasuke was out cold on top of him…and the flames were gone.

Chagrined, Naruto came to learn that sexual release was strong enough to snap Sasuke out of his seal induced flashbacks.

Sasuke was very aggressive with Naruto during these befuddled events. Once, Sasuke had grabbed a hank of Naruto's hair in each fist and shoved his face toward his leaking erection. Naruto resisted, feeling that this was stepping over a line, that this was more than restoring balance to wildly fluctuating chakra.

But from his vantage point near Sasuke's crotch, he looked up the expanse of pale flesh and hard, defined muscles. God's it was the stuff of his dreams. Never in his life had he seen anything more beautiful.

Enraptured, he lowered his head and, with all the ardor that lived inside him, used every skill he'd ever learned to tenderly work Sasuke beyond his delusional state.

Later, as Sasuke slept, Naruto sat on the floor leaning against the bed and cried. He felt like a god damned rapist. Sasuke would never, in his right mind, want such a thing from Naruto. He should stop this. He should stay away from Sasuke at all costs.

But now, having seen Sasuke actually hurt himself during these episodes and knowing that he, with his sage connections, was the only one to know if it happened while Sasuke was holed up behind the gates of his home, Naruto was scared to leave.

So he innovated again, creating a lifelike clone to leave when he had to be gone. The clone had to be durable enough to withstand rough physical contact and also be able to think on its feet.

Naruto was really proud of his clone when everything went to hell.

The clone had been hanging out at the bar tapped into the Uchiha across the room when it became aware of the change. The clone had been smart enough to know that blowing the brunet in the middle of the bar was probably a bad idea and had used a bit of intuition wondering if anger would be as effective.

So the clone had picked a fight with the confused Uchiha. Not only had the clone withstood a serious beating without vanishing, but it had done what Naruto would have done; let Sasuke win.

So this is was the fucked up mess that their relationship had devolved to; Naruto stalked Sasuke and if the episodes happened at the manor, jerked him off. If they happened in public, Naruto picked fights.

He gave himself a derisive snort. Of course, Sasuke didn't remember the sex; he was never engaged. Naruto did everything. The fights, however, required Sasuke to first get pissed, and then participate. He remembered every detail. Everyone in Konoha remembered every detail including Naruto lying on his back, bleeding and defeated.

He should go to Tsunade or tell Sakura, but he'd backed himself into a corner. Eventually he'd have to for Sasuke's sake, but the molestations would come to light and then…

If Sasuke didn't run him through first, he'd be run out of town. Certainly his dreams were over. His dreams of Sasuke's friendship. His dreams of becoming Hokage. His dreams of, one day, not being alone.

**~~~~~~~Confusion~~~~~~~**

"How are you adjusting?"

"Fine," Sasuke's lukewarm response to the Hokage's question indicated otherwise.

"I understand there have been confrontations." Tsunade watched Sasuke from across her desk. For a moment she thought he was going to cry.

I…It….I would prefer no confrontations…" his voice faded. Then he started again, his face a rigid mask. "It seems that Uzumaki is unhappy with my return."

"Has he said why?"

"No," Sasuke's voice wavered. "He only wants to fight."

"I'm surprised I haven't seen you in the hospital."

Sasuke looked surprised. "Why?"

"Well, to put you back together after he takes you apart," she said, picking her nails idly.

Sasuke snorted.

"What?"

"He's no better a ninja than when I left. I have to be careful to keep from hurting him too badly."

"Is that right?"

Sasuke just looked at her.

"Why do you think he does it then? He's never struck me as particularly masochistic."

"I…"Sasuke's head dropped." I guess he just hates me."

Tsunade shrugged. "Enough about him. How are you doing? Is the mission schedule too taxing?"

"It's fine. I could use more."

"Are you happy being back in your old home?"

Sasuke was silent several moments, then responded, "It's…I may want to explore other options at some point."

Tsunade raised a brow.

"It's large and would require a lot of time and money to restore it properly."

She studied him for a moment.

"Is there anything I can do for you, Sasuke?" she asked gently. "I can talk to Naruto if…"

"No!" he said quickly. "He…" Sasuke's shoulders slumped and he whispered, "He has every reason to hate me." He lifted his eyes to her. "Maybe more missions. I'll just stay out of his way."

Sasuke's body language tugged at her. The little bastards under her care were such fucked up beings. They all walked around with this bag of labels; ninja, killer, male, son, heir, prodigy, loser. The first label they tried to lose was the one that was impossible to shed; human.

It was always so tempting to just shove people in chairs and say, "Look, this is how it is…"

But she'd learned that this arrogant male world seldom listened. These little duckies needed to figure things out themselves. Clarity was not out of the question, it just usually came at the point of a sword, and often too late.

She smiled to herself. She thought that this time though, she could show them some clarity.

"Yes. Missions. I agree. Shikamaru will be in touch."

+++

"Baaaa-Chaaaan," Naruto whined. "I can't go out with a team. Someone's gonna get hurt."

"Shut it, brat," Tsunade snapped. "Nara's team needs your skills this time."

Naruto frowned and wrung his hands.

"Tell him Shika," Tsunade nodded to the brunet standing next to Naruto.

Shikamaru flipped through the pages in his hands, his face impassive.

"It seems tactically impractical to treat this as a typical A or S class mission." He looked up. "There are three options as I see it.

"We can deploy Konoha's entire ninja contingent from Jounin up, to clean out the rebel nest in the forest northwest of Suna. If we make the first move, however, it will be considered a declaration of war by at least two hidden villages, possibly three."

Naruto stood with his eyes closed, his fists clenched.

"Option two is that Ko-chan stays here and never returns to her family in Waterfall again."

Naruto's eyes flew open and he gaped at Shikamaru at this suggestion.

"Or Uzumaki-san can deploy with a team and we let the rebels make the first move. We can clean out the forest and it will be in the name of protecting the Raikage's niece.

Naruto scrubbed his hands through his hair in frustration. Then his head shot up. "What if we take her around the forest?"

"That would add almost a month to the trip," Tsunade said. "Have you ever met her?"

"She'd never make it," Shikamaru interjected.

After several moments of silence, Naruto finally gritted out, "On the off chance I agree to this, who's on this team anyway?"

"My usual team," Shikamaru answered and Naruto felt the blood leave his face. "Me, Tsugi and…Sasuke."

Five minutes later Naruto found himself standing in front of Tsunade. Shikamaru was gone and she'd come around the desk to stand in front of him.

"No," he whispered.

She laughed. "You're not Hokage yet, you little shit. Until then I dispense missions and you say 'Hai, Hokage-sama.'"

"But, grandma..."

"Ah!" She wagged her finger. "Hai, Hokage-sama."

"But…"

She reached and squished his face in her hands, manipulating his lips and jaw. "Hai, Hokage-sama," she growled. "Say it! You'll find it cathartic. Or at least less painful.

"B…"

"Say! It!"

"Hai, Hokage-sama," he finally muttered. She turned him around and shoved him toward the door.

She laughed again as she heard him muttering under his breath, "…saggy…old…menopausal…"

+++

Sasuke wondered when Naruto slept. The blond ninja hadn't even packed a tent as far as Sasuke could tell. He took all the shifts guarding and almost never ate with them or sat around the fire at night.

Sasuke was no idiot; Naruto was clearly avoiding him. At least it was better than fighting.

When he was with the team, Naruto spent his time entertaining the client. He was charming, funny and thoughtful and Sasuke knew that if the poor girl was a year or two older, she'd be madly in love with the gorgeous blond.

Sasuke was nervous though. He knew he'd need to work out these issues with Naruto someday, but he'd have to get him through this mission first.

What the hell was the Godaime thinking? He'd gathered that this mission was going to be especially dangerous, thus the extra ninja, but …Naruto?

Fuck, he had to be the worst ninja in the village. Maybe Tsunade hoped some stress on the relationship would force them to sort out some personal issues, and maybe it would, but at what cost? If it came down to a choice between Naruto or the client, the client could bend over and kiss her pre-teen ass goodbye.

He'd just have to be the best ninja he'd ever been when the shit hit the fan.

+++

Eleven days into the mission, just as the horizon began its introduction of the sun, Sasuke woke to the sound of chirping; Naruto's signal. He scrambled out of his tent to gather with the rest of the team around the embers of last night's fire.

"They're two miles out and closing," Naruto said in a hushed voice. He swept his hand through the dirt and started drawing with a twig.

"There are three groups coming from three directions, hoping to hem us in. The only way clear is the way we came."

"How many?" Shikamaru asked, studying Naruto's sketch.

"Totally? About a hundred."

"A hundred?!" Sasuke hissed. "Fuck!" They were dead.

"I can clear a path north, so you can go on," Naruto looked meaningfully at the team lead. "But I need to be able to work."

Shikamaru nodded without hesitation. "Just tell me what you need."

"I really hate subjecting that little sweetie to this, but I think just a shield and then you get the hell out of here."

"Okay…"

"What? Wait!" Sasuke interrupted. "What are you talking about? I don't understand the plan."

Shikamaru just looked at him. Sasuke threw his hands up. "What am I supposed to do?" He pointed at Tsugi. "What are we supposed to do?"

"Nothing. Now shut up."

"Noth…"

"Shut up, Uchiha," Shikamaru growled then turned to Naruto.

"How long?"

Naruto closed his eyes and Sasuke swayed as he felt Naruto's chakra caress his senses and move through the earth under this feet.

"They're moving fast. Three minutes."

"Shit! Tsugi, get Ko-Chan out here now." He turned back to Naruto. "Where do you want us?"

Naruto pointed to a stand of trees. "There. Shika, try not to let her see, okay?"

The team, minus Naruto and Sasuke rushed over to the stand of trees. Tsugi wrapped Ko in a cloak and pulled her head into his chest.

"Naruto, I don't understand the plan." Sasuke was truly confused.

"I don't know what Shika will decide after this, because we're splitting up here. Just get over there for now."

"But…"

Go!" Naruto said in a panicked voice as he looked north then east.

Sasuke just stood there.

"Son of a bitch!" Naruto howled. Then the air around Sasuke thickened and he found himself lifted off the ground and flung through the air to land at Shikamaru's feet.

Before he could gain his footing, a hazy red cloud surrounded everyone but Naruto, who stood alone in the center of the clearing.

The first wave of about thirty ninja descended out of the trees about one minute later. Sasuke pounded on the shield trying to get to Naruto, who stood against this band alone.

Then his arms fell limp to his sides as he actually heard Naruto's chakra. His mouth hung open as the air around the enemy ninja clouded with swirling…sand? Yes, sand had risen out of the ground and begun to take on a glint.

Tsugi squeezed a whimpering pre-teen as their shield was peppered with sprays of blood and bits of flesh. Blood flew everywhere, painting every tree and rock as screams filled the air. Sasuke realized that the sand had been superheated, transformed into glass and was shredding the thirty bodies into unrecognizable chunks of steaming, oozing biota.

But before his mind could categorize and understand, the second wave of ninja arrived from the east.

Naruto, dripping with enemy blood and still unarmed, turned. He made a couple of quick hand seals and thirty more Naruto's appeared.

He pointed south and yelled, "Slow them down."

Then he turned back to the enemy, just now dropping from the branches overhead. They seemed taken aback, undoubtedly expecting to see a different result from their advance team.

"It's Uzumaki Naruto," someone shrieked.

"Fuck!"

"Run!" Several turned and started to flee.

Sasuke watched as wind picked up in the clearing and scooped the whole lot of enemy ninja into a writhing, screaming clump.

"Spare us!"

"Mercy!"

Their screams were lost as a funnel of pure white flame swept from the sky and through the mass of bodies leaving behind…nothing.

Ko was sobbing and clinging to Sasuke as he watched, stupefied, speechless, his brain racing to comprehend what he was seeing.

Naruto dropped into a fighting stance, finally pulling a sword and creating from nothing a giant, glowing pure chakra shuriken. His head was cocked and he seemed to be listening and sniffing.

Then the shield was gone and Ko was running toward Naruto. He saw her coming and tossed his shuriken away, obliterating four trees and a boulder.

"Naruto…" She threw herself into his arms. "You're so brave," she snuggled, ignoring the blood transferring itself to her. "I'm going to marry you when I grow up," she cried, her overwrought emotions spilling out of her.

Sasuke stood back, snippets of clarity clicking into place.

"He could crush me like a gnat," he whispered, realization falling out of his mouth without thought.

"Yep!" Shikamaru smacked his shoulder and went to Naruto.

"Shika, my clones bought about six minutes. Head north. I'll get the rest of these guys and you shouldn't have any more trouble."

Shikamaru grabbed an armload of their supplies and nodded. "We'll see you back in Konoha, Naruto."

Naruto knelt in front of Ko and grinned. "Go with these guys. They'll take good care of you."

"Naruto…" she reached for him again.

"I get to Whirlpool every once in a while. Buy me some ramen next time I'm there?" he said as he tried to wipe blood from her cheek, but only adding more from the mess on his hands.

Tsugi dropped to one knee and bowed his head. "Naruto-sama, I…"

Naruto jerked him to his feet and cuffed him on the side of his head. "I told you to stop that," he frowned.

Then he grinned and punched the younger ninja in the shoulder. "Take care of my girl, okay?"

The blushing boy nodded and Naruto turned back at a sound coming from the forest behind him.

A giant shuriken reformed in his hand and he yelled over his shoulder, "Go on. Get the hell out of here. She's seen enough."

Sasuke, still standing unmoving as his brain raced to understand all he'd seen, started to open his mouth when Shikamaru grabbed his arm and jerked him into a run, leaving a grinning Naruto to face another small army of ninja, alone, once again.

**~~~~~~~The Clouds Part~~~~~~~**

"A sage?"

Shikamaru had explained this to Sasuke on the trek back to Konoha after an uneventful journey from their campsite to Ko-chan's door two weeks ago. Now he sat alone at Ichiruka's trying to understand what it all meant.

He was rearranging noodles idly in his bowl, reliving and trying to understand the theory behind what he'd seen from Naruto, when the seat next to him became occupied.

"Hey," he said to Sakura.

"Hi, Sasuke," she answered. "How are you?"

"Okay." And because it was only thing filling his mind, he turned to her and asked, "Did you know Naruto is a sage?"

She laughed. "Of course. It's not a secret."

After waiting for her to place her order and break her chopsticks, he started again. "I don't understand."

She looked at him shrewdly. "We all have a lot of questions these days."

He shook his head. "I don't even know what questions to ask."

Her expression softened. "How about telling me how you're really feeling."

"I…I'm not sure."

"Naruto asked me to look out for you. He seemed…worried."

Sasuke shook his head in confusion. "Why would he be? I haven't seen him at all unless he's trying to beat the shit out of me."

"Yeah, I don't know what's going on either. All I know is that he's worried about you."

"Then why is he fighting me? And…" He rubbed his face, ready to admit out loud what he'd been reluctant to admit thus far. "And…letting me win?"

He dropped his chopsticks and whispered, "He is letting me win, isn't he?"

"Assuredly," she laughed. "I don't think this entire village banded together could beat him."

"I….just…don't…"

She patted his hand. "I don't know the questions either. But I do know the answer."

He stiffened and leaned toward her expectantly. "What!?"

"He loves you."

"But he hasn't…."

She silenced him with a fingertip to his lips. "A lot of questions. One answer." She put her forehead to his. "He loves you. He always has."

+++

Sasuke sat on his porch trying to think of someplace else he could sleep for the night. He was contemplating the relative merits of a park bench when the tiniest brush of chakra touched his senses.

Fuck! Naruto was all he could think about! When Sasuke wasn't having blackouts and nightmares, he was hallucinating, seeing Naruto around every corner. And dreaming…having such dreams….

The chakra, the dreams, all seemed so real. Was he truly losing his mind? Naruto had come and gone again. Sasuke knew Naruto was gone. He'd been on guard duty at the gates when Naruto, his head hanging, had passed through, without so much as a glance in his direction.

Sasuke's head thumped back against the wall and he sighed. Blackouts…. Nightmares…. Hallucinations… Dreams….

Something clicked!

His eyes narrowed and he leaned forward. "Dobe!"

"Uzumaki Naruto get your blond ass out here." A pause. "I know you're there, damnit!"

A second later a blond dropped off the porch roof and took a timid step forward.

Sasuke activated his Sharingan. "You're not Naruto."

"No."

"You're spying on me."

"Well, my instructions call it  _protection_ , not spying."

"Get up here and sit. I need answers and you are going to give them to me."

The clone searched its instructions and, finding nothing about this situation one way or another, shrugged and complied. "I don't know how much help I'll be. I don't have memories; just instructions."

Sasuke narrowed his eyes. "Well, we'll just settle for that then, won't we?"

The clone shrugged again.

"Spill it!"

"Naruto is just guessing, but it seems you are having flashbacks to the massacre." Sasuke gasped, but the clone continued. "And when you do, the cursed seal takes over."

The clone fidgeted a moment then went on. "I think you've hurt yourself before because I have instructions regarding first aid. And if I can't heal your wounds, I'm supposed to get Tsunade."

Sasuke's mind was racing. Nightmares, blackouts…

"It seems there are ways to snap you out of it, though."

"Fighting," Sasuke whispered, nodding.

"And sex."

Sasuke choked on a particularly lumpy piece of air and coughed until his eyes watered.

"How the fuck did we arrive at that solution," he finally wheezed out.

"Don't know," the clone shrugged. "But I have instructions…." He looked thoughtful. "I'm not to go beyond jerking you off," he ticked on a thick finger. "Hands only," he ticked another finger, "no matter what else you seem to want."

"Jerking….no matter what I…" Sasuke repeated dazedly. "Hands only?"

"And, let's see," the clone touched the tip of the next finger. "Fighting is for public and the hand jobs are for here."

"Of course," Sasuke blinked several times. "Very….thoughtful." The clone dropped his hands in his lap and grinned, looking pleased that he remembered all the instructions correctly.

The two sat in silence as Sasuke digested this information. The pieces where all there and a picture was forming. As he sat during that warm night, lulled and tempted by the nocturnal music of the natural world around him, he fought an internal battle between heart and brain. There, with his blue eyed, blond...protector...sitting across from him, it was so easy to imagine a picture with blue skies and golden sunshine. Could it be true?

Dreams….hallucinations…

+++

Sasuke sat next to the clone at Ichiruka's trying to sift reality from illusion in the images in his mind.

Would Naruto really do this? Had Naruto really been there with him, for him, these last months? There was such a disconnect between his lucid moments with Naruto – fists, feet, chidori – and his dreams of Naruto – fingertips, lips, warmth.

He needed more information, facts. But it scared him. What if it was all illusion? A chimera of happiness?

"Uchiha-san?" He'd been so lost in thought that he hadn't been aware of the group of ninja who had approached.

"What?"

"Uchiha-san." A pimply-faced Chunin bowed jerkily, his excitement oozing from his very pores. He held out a scroll. "We," he waved, encompassing the equally excited group of teens around him. "We have started a petition."

Sasuke just blinked at the boy.

"See, we overheard some Anbu talking about when Uzu-shithead-maki will be Hokage and decided that just couldn't stand."

Sasuke stiffened.

"So we wrote this petition listing dates and details of all the times he attacked you for no reason. And then of course, how you beat him to a bloody pulp every single time." The teen unrolled the scroll. "We've been going around getting signatures."

Sasuke's stomach plummeted to his boots.

"You see, he just can't be Hokage. Hokage is supposed to be the pinnacle of shinobi excellence, that for which we all strive. So we are petitioning for the council and Godaime to make  _you_ Hokage!"

The six youths just beamed at him, obviously their proudest moment.

"Get out of here," Sasuke said calmly.

"Wha…" The leader of the group stammered.

"Get. The fuck. Out. Of here!" Sasuke's voice took on a more and more threatening tone until he snarled the last word.

Minutes after they shuffled away in hurt confusion, Sasuke poofed to his property, his body shaking with agitation.

Visions filled his mind. Staring down at Naruto's defeated body, the entire village as witness. Sounds filtered in, jeering, booing, insults. And Naruto coming back for it, starting it, asking for it, again and again.

Then he thought of their mission, the manipulation of multiple elements, the creation of a fire that even he, an Uchiha could not comprehend.

His thoughts kept circling, but kept coming back to the idea that Naruto had jeopardized his one dream for Sasuke's sake.

Naruto's one dream…

Another memory surfaced. A red faced teenager, shouting, spittle flying from his mouth, his lashes glistening, "I'll never give up on you Sasuke! My bond. Our bond. Ever…ever…ever…"

Sasuke's heart hammered. Could it really be?

_Many questions. One answer. "Naruto loves you."_

The blond clone fidgeted catching his eye.

"When does Naruto get back?" Sasuke snapped.

"Late tonight, early tomorrow morning."

Sasuke nodded. Then he pulled a kunai from his holster and, with enviable precision, impaled the clone in the heart.

+++

Naruto about broke his neck falling from the tree branch. All of his clone's memories had just rushed back to him.

Sasuke knew!

Naruto stood there on the forest floor, his arms limp at his sides, his brain filled with white noise.

Fuck! What to do…

He stood there in the misting rain for over an hour. Twice he turned away from Konoha, thinking to run away, to just disappear.

But his precious people all lived in Konoha. He couldn't leave them. Who would protect them? He imagined the old hag assigning his dicier missions to Neji or Kakashi and his stomach roiled.

"No!" Those missions were his responsibility. He had the strength, the power to take those missions, leaving the safer missions for his comrades. Indeed it was such a source of secret pride that not a single ninja had died in action since he'd returned from sage training.

But now what? Sasuke could be in grandma's office even now, demanding his imprisonment or banishment for the shit he'd done.

Maybe they'd let him keep doing the missions, let him protect Konoha. He could stay in confinement, in isolation the rest of the time.

Dropping his head in despair he started back home. He'd done the crimes, he'd have to do the time. He'd just have to make sure someone listened to him about Sasuke. Maybe he could show Tsunade the memories in secret and she could find a way to fix it.

He hated to think his actions, those undertaken with the sole purpose of protecting his most beloved person, would leave that person in the greatest danger.

+++

Except for the guards at the gate, Konoha was asleep when Naruto got home. His breath coming in shallow pants, he walked up to the guards expecting to be slapped in cuffs and hauled away.

"Hey, Uzumaki," one called out. "Safe trip?"

"Uh, yeah," he stammered.

"Dude, you reek. Messy one?"

"Hehe," he stuttered. "Yeah, messy."

"Well, get some sleep. Look me up day after tomorrow and you can buy me some ramen."

Naruto just stood there a moment as feeling returned to numb limbs.

"Yeah, day after tomorrow," he said and started inching forward warily. Okay, so Sasuke had not turned him in.

He gasped. Sasuke! The bastard was alone! Naruto sent his chakra to the Uchiha district. Sasuke wasn't there.

"Uhm, hey." He scratched at some dried blood on his cheek. "Is Uchi…Shikamaru's team deployed right now?"

The guard looked at a scroll. "Nope, they're here."

"Okay."

"Well, goodnight, Naruto."

"Back atcha…"

Naruto walked to his apartment, sending his chakra out in a grid trying to find his…his… Damnit, his  _friend_. Sasuke was his friend even if he didn't know it. When he reached his apartment, he scanned the interior out of habit.

Sasuke was inside! He was inside Naruto's apartment!

Naruto stood for many long moments staring at his doorknob, then finally slid the door open.

There, sprawled on his bed across the room was Sasuke.

"Shut the door. You're letting the cold air in," Sasuke groused into the pillow under his head.

Naruto obeyed automatically, but didn't come any further into the room.

"Dobe, you're apartment is disgusting."

Naruto looked around, not really seeing, his mind still reeling. "Uh, yeah, I, uh, don't spend much time here."

Sasuke picked his head up and looked blearily at Naruto.

"We have an appointment with Tsunade at eleven tomorrow morning."

O…Okay." Naruto scratched the back of his head.

Sasuke flopped back down onto the pillow, pulled the covers up to his neck and seconds later, Naruto heard the deep even breaths associated with sleep.

+++

Sasuke woke slowly, languorously, warm and rested. The smells and lingering chakra signature were so comforting. He rolled to his side and opened his eyes.

Naruto…. The blond had sunk to the floor where he'd stood last night and had fallen asleep propped against the wall. His head hung at an awkward angle and he still wore the bloody, mud-crusted clothing from his mission.

Sasuke looked at the clock. His appointment was in an hour. He threw the covers off and stood.

"Dobe!" Naruto raised his head, wincing, and opened his eyes. "Want a shower before the appointment? I don't want to be late."

Naruto rubbed his mouth with the back of his hand. He had one hour until….the end.

"Okay," he whispered and after grabbing clean clothes, disappeared into the bathroom without another word.

+++

As the pair walked, Naruto studied Sasuke. He looked healthy. No bruises or cuts were visible. He seemed rested and…cheerful, although Naruto wasn't sure what that emotion actually looked like on an Uchiha.

But, why shouldn't he be cheerful? Naruto was going to get his comeuppance for months of abuse. Still, Naruto wanted Sasuke to know that there had been no malice. Not that Sasuke would care, but Naruto wanted him to know that as far as Naruto was concerned, Sasuke was welcome home…so welcome.

"Sasuke, I want you to know that I never…"

"Naruto," Sasuke interrupted.

"Huh?"

"Your mission. Tell me about your mission."

"Uhm," Naruto couldn't even remember his mission as blood filled his ears and squirming creatures filled his stomach. "There was a, uhm, scroll…and some…"

"Bandits?" Sasuke offered

"Uh, yeah."

"Lots of them?"

"I guess so."

"Fighting?"

'Huh?"

"Was there fighting?"

Naruto winced and sighed. "Yeah. There always is."

"Kunai and shuriken and chakra?" Sasuke prompted.

"Sasuke…"

They had reached the tower. Sasuke turned to Naruto.

"Everything. Tell her everything. All of it."

Naruto stared at his shoes, the backs of his eyes burning.

"Don't leave anything out. Not a single detail."

"Okay," Naruto whispered. Then his head shot up and his eyes were rimmed in red.

"I'm so sorry, Sasuke. Please believe…"

"You're sorry?"

Naruto thought a moment. Was he sorry?

"Yes. No. Sort of."

Sasuke grabbed his sleeve and pulled him up the steps. "We'll talk later. Let's go.

Naruto told everything. He'd even let Tsunade and Sasuke into his mind to see the actual memories. He knew they were also bombarded with his emotions as they viewed the scenes, including his fear, his determination, he doubts, his overwhelming guilt. And his yearnings, his love.

He knew tears tracked down his cheeks as they watched him worshipping Sasuke's body with his mouth.

"Why, Naruto…" It was a voice, but Naruto couldn't tell who asked. Tsunade, Sasuke, perhaps his own voice.

"I…I…couldn't stop. It was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen in my life," he whispered, knowing that no one would understand but him.

Finally Tsunade sent him to sit outside while Sasuke remained behind. He kept waiting for guards to show up and his incarceration to begin.

Finally six hours later, just as he'd dozed off from lack of sleep the night before, Sasuke shuffled down the steps, his hands in his pockets.

"Walk with me."

Feeling a sort of anticlimax that he wasn't clapped in irons in Konoha prison, or standing outside the gates trying to figure where and how he was going to live, he stood and fell into step next to Sasuke.

They walked in silence for a short distance, until Sasuke turned off the road. His thoughts elsewhere, Naruto followed him automatically down a walk, up a flight of steps and through a doorway.

"What do you think?"

"Huh?" Naruto looked at Sasuke vacantly.

"What do you think?" Sasuke repeated, indicating the room with a wave of his arm.

Naruto blinked and looked. They were in a spacious, airy, brightly sunlit apartment. It was large and clean, with several doors leading to other rooms.

"Oh. It's nice."

Sasuke walked around, pulling Naruto by the sleeve, opening doors.

"Two bedrooms. Only one bath, but it's large. Nice western view; good for catching sunsets."

"It's nice," Naruto repeated. "You moving?"

Sasuke put his hand in the middle of Naruto's chest and shoved him into a wall. Here it came, finally.

"I didn't know it," Sasuke said quietly, "but I needed help."

Naruto stopped breathing.

Sasuke pulled the collar of his gi top aside showing Naruto the three black dots Orochimaru had used to mark Sasuke.

"Touch it." Naruto just swallowed loudly and Sasuke said, "Go ahead."

Naruto did; there was nothing there?

"It's just a tattoo now. Tsunade undid the seal portion of it. Orochimaru's influence is gone now."

"Sasuke," Naruto couldn't say more around the lump in his throat.

"But I still need more." Sasuke shoved a hand through his hair, still standing very close to Naruto. "I've donated the entire Uchiha district to Konoha"

Naruto gasped, not aware that he'd placed his hand over the top of Sasuke's on his chest.

"I can't live there anymore," Sasuke continued. "I thought I could just come home, but…"

Naruto's stomach fell. Was Sasuke going to leave again?

"I thought the buildings were home."

Their fingers were laced together on Naruto's chest. Sasuke tilted his head and looked at them. Naruto followed Sasuke's gaze and panicked that he was once again touching his friend uninvited, he jerked his hand free.

"Naruto…"Sasuke started quietly, his cheeks reddening. "Naruto, I…killed Orochimaru. Then I…I came home for you."

"Sas…"

"I needed to be where someone loved me," Sasuke laughed without humor. "You're it. The only one on the face of the earth."

Sasuke's face fell. "Then every time I saw you…you…attacked me. Hit me."

Naruto grabbed Sasuke's shoulders, his expression desperate.

"No! No! It was never like that." He let go of Sasuke and covered his face with his hands. "Christ, I am so sorry. So, so sorry. I'm a stupid, stupid idiot, but I never…"

"Naruto," Sasuke interrupted. "I know."

**~~~~~~~The Night~~~~~~~**

Sasuke straightened and cleared his throat. He seemed…nervous?

"So," he started. "Tsunade said I needed changes. First," he rubbed his shoulder, "the seal."

He led Naruto across the room, opened a door and pointed at the bath inside. "Second, a new place to live."

He pulled Naruto to another door and opened it, revealing a small bedroom. "And maybe…" Sasuke hesitated, "a family."

He pulled Naruto into the room. "What do you think? Would a kid like this room?"

Naruto hadn't even been completely aware of the strength of his secret dreams until they turned to ash in his chest. He knew tears were close to the surface so he turned his back to Sasuke and nodded, trying desperately to find a face that might match some words of support and encouragement.

Then he was being pulled to another room; another, larger bedroom. And fingers were being pushed through his hair.

"Naruto, I…I know it's unconventional, and I know that I don't really know these things about you." Tears were being wiped from his cheeks. "And if you agree, it might be difficult at times, and… you have to think about being Hokage…"

Sasuke stepped close. Finally their breaths mingled. One more scant inch and their lips would touch.

"Tsunade has a list of surrogates," Sasuke whispered. He brushed his fingers across Naruto's lips. "Be my family? Raise my children? Let me raise your children?" Then he closed his eyes and pulled Naruto in till their lips touched.

Naruto's brain ceased to be a participant in the engagement and only rejoined dazedly when Sasuke pulled back slightly and he realized that he was on his knees on the floor with Sasuke straddling his thighs. Evidently his hands had decided to take charge after his brain had headed south because Sasuke was bare from the waist up and his shirt was bunched in Naruto's fist.

Sasuke stood, untied his pants and let them fall to the floor. Then he pulled the shirt from Naruto's grasp, fished around and returned to his spot on Naruto's lap. He held his hand up and Naruto saw the item gripped in trembling fingers.

"Lube?" he asked in disbelief. "You brought lube?"

"I've been having dreams," Sasuke whispered as he opened the tube and squeezed a glob onto his fingers.

"Dreams…," Naruto repeated vaguely, his eyes riveted on Sasuke's hands.

"Dreams of warmth." Sasuke reached behind himself with one hand and reached for the tie on Naruto's pants with the other.

"Warmth…," Naruto parroted, sweat beading on his temples.

"Dreams of pleasure," Sasuke arched back into his own hand and sighed.

"Plea…pleasure," Naruto swallowed loudly once, twice. Sasuke pulled back and locked gazes with Naruto.

Dreams of…" Sasuke reached into Naruto's open pants and pulled his prize free. "Of love?"

"Love," Naruto repeated fervently. "Yes, love."

"All these things that you did," Sasuke squeezed more lube and slowly covered the hard flesh between them. "The fighting, the…other. You are my friend, aren't you Naruto." It wasn't posed as a question.

"Yes," Naruto answered passionately.

"And more?" Sasuke rose up and positioned himself to join their bodies.

"Yes," Naruto gripped Sasuke's hips in calloused hands. "More. Everything."

Sasuke lowered himself in one smooth movement and stilled at Naruto's sob. He put his hand on Naruto's cheek and looked him in the eye.

"Okay?"

Naruto's response was to clutch Sasuke in a desperate grip and lever them to the floor.

As he was surrounded by, swamped in, buried under Naruto's passion, Sasuke was unaware of the tears running down his temples until Naruto licked them away.

Naruto, his own personal light, parted his flesh and entered his body and it changed something fundamental inside him. Sunshine became part of his DNA. In his soul, clouds parted and revealed a glittering blue landscape. Just as his body was penetrated, the dark recesses inside him were also penetrated. Shadows were found and banished under brilliant golden light.

He had always been night, would always be night, but here in the unfurnished bedroom of his new home, he learned that night was still only a function of the sun, one half of the cycle of life. He came to understand that the gods had created both, two elements, both components of the day. Night. Day. There could not be one without the other.

+++

"God damnit, Naruto, Harder," Sasuke growled from his position on his knees. "C'mon, fuck me like you mean it."

Naruto tried for better purchase on Sasuke's hips, but they were both soaking with sweat and other manner of bodily fluids, and his hands kept slipping.

"Fuck, Naruto." Sasuke shoved backward. "I know you have more. I want it. All of it. Everything you've got."

He found himself being jerked upright into Naruto's chest. Strong, thick fingers slid around and up over his shoulders and with this new leverage he found himself subject to a bone jarring pounding. As the edges of his vision filled with white and tingling spread through his limbs, he heard Naruto's mindless whispers.

"Love you…love you…love you…"

+++

Naruto struggled lightly, testing the grip that held his wrists pinned near his head. His knees were up and out and equally secured under Sasuke's weight.

"Now we're going to do this my way."

Naruto's eyes rolled back in his head when Sasuke dropped himself heavily onto the thick erection and began riding the blond in earnest.

"I…ah…I…mmm," Naruto panted. "Thought we were going to…ahh…do this your way."

"This is my way."

+++

Sasuke shook the water off his hands, adding towels to his mental list of things he wanted to move from the house to this apartment. Then he walked back to the bedroom.

No sooner had he stepped over the threshold, he found himself sandwiched between cold drywall and a hot, hard torso. Before he even had time to grunt, Naruto pulled one of his legs up and over a muscled shoulder and bent the other between their two bodies.

Sasuke had a fleeting thought that he was grateful for his flexibility when he was impaled where they stood. Naruto's aim was flawless and that quick, Sasuke was once again, quivering on the razors edge of release.

Sasuke struggled lightly, not enough to actually get free. Naruto studied him for several moments, assuring himself that they were well within the boundaries of this experiment.

"You're gonna take it," Naruto growled and bit Sasuke's neck harshly.

Just like that, it was over for Sasuke. He cried out Naruto's name as he erupted between them.

"You're gonna cum again," Naruto snarled and thrust, hitching Sasuke's body until he knew he'd found that spot again.

It was hard. It was hot. It was quick. Within three minutes, they were both covered in sweat and cum and the only thing holding them up was Naruto's wobbly grip. Scratch that…they both slid to the floor against the wall.

"Fuck, I missed you."

Sasuke snorted. "Idiot. I took a leak and washed my hands."

Naruto lifted one bleary eyelid. "And you call me an idiot?"

+++

Are you certain you're happy with…" Naruto and Sasuke were on their sides facing each other. "Ya know…with this?" He waved his hand indicating the space between their crotches.

Sasuke smirked. After several seconds he finally asked, "Have you ever been fucked?"

"No." He scratched his cheek and frowned. "Now that you mention it, no one's ever wanted to fuck me."

"That's because there are more of me than you." Naruto raised his eyebrows and nodded absently.

"You need to experience this once," Sasuke said decisively, sitting up and moving to Naruto's side. Sasuke held up two fingers.

"Just this," he said. "I'll show you."

"Anything you want." If there was any reluctance on Naruto's part, Sasuke didn't see it.

Twenty minutes later, Naruto couldn't even recite his own name. Holy Christ, he'd never felt anything like that in his life. He peeled his eyelids back and looked at Sasuke.

He expected to see a superior smirk, especially considering the power he'd just displayed over every cell in Naruto's body. Instead, Sasuke's look was intense, his eyes glittering with adoration.

"Dear gods," Naruto rasped. He rolled on top of Sasuke and buried his head in Sasuke's neck. "I want to give that to you a hundred times a day for the rest of your life."

Sasuke laughed out loud as he felt Naruto's dick filling out near his thigh.

"I believe you could."

+++

"What are you doing?" Sasuke rasped, rubbing his eyes. He'd dozed, but since it was still dark out, he knew it hadn't been for long.

"Huh?" Naruto asked distractedly, staring holes through the glowing hand he held out in front of his face.

"What are you doing?" Sasuke sat up and scooted closer.

"Oh, trying to control my chakra," Naruto answered, then touched a glowing finger to his other forearm. It made a popping sound and he jumped slightly. "…too much."

"You want  _less_  chakra?"

Still focusing on his hand, Naruto nodded, "Yeah, for me it's always been big chakra. The more the better. As much as I could suck out of the universe and use for destruction."

He touched his forearm again and nodded in satisfaction. "While you were sleeping, it occurred to me that there might be other uses. After all, the old hag uses it for healing."

"Okay," Sasuke shrugged, fairly used to the notion that he needed a trail of breadcrumbs to follow Naruto's thoughts.

"Whaddaya think?" Naruto asked and touched Sasuke's arm.

At the slight tingle, Sasuke nodded sardonically. "Yep. It's little. Good job."

Twenty minutes later, Sasuke couldn't even recite his own name. Holy Christ, he'd never felt anything like that in his life. He peeled his eyelids back and looked at Naruto.

"I know you've been waiting your whole life for this, but," Sasuke smirked weakly. "You win."

+++

Sasuke sat lotus style next to Naruto's hip and shook his head, a look of mild revulsion on his face.

"You and Sakura?" He glanced at Naruto's crotch and his lips curled in distaste. "I…really don't know what to say."

Naruto shrugged. "It was right after you left." He looked thoughtful a moment. "We each needed some comfort, someone to hold onto. It was just the one time."

"So  _that's_ been  _inside_  Sakura." Sasuke poked Naruto's dick as if it had teeth.

Naruto laughed. "I  _have_  washed it since then."

"Yeah, but," Sasuke paused. "I know you had a thing for her, but to me it feels like…like…fucking your sister. And she's a  _girl_."

"Well, that's actually what we figured out, too. It was really weird for a while after that and that's when we figured out that we love each other more like siblings."

Naruto laughed. "And I'm not the most well traveled guy in the world, but I do know she's a girl."

Sasuke frowned. "Males or females; it doesn't matter to you?"

Naruto just shrugged.

"So you just wander around the countryside fucking anything with a pulse?" Sasuke sniffed in disdain.

Naruto blinked. Then blinked again. "Yeah. When folks hear that Uzumaki Naruto is coming to town, they start locking up their sons, daughters and sheep."

"Hn," Sasuke blushed.

"You're jealous," Naruto grinned.

Sasuke said nothing for a several moments. "Can you live without pussy?"

"I gotta tell ya, Sas, this conversation is getting weirder and weirder."

Sasuke sighed. "What I'm trying to ask is if you can be satisfied fucking just me from now on. Maybe be like a…"

"Like a…?" Naruto whispered when Sasuke paused.

"Husband?" Sasuke hadn't erased his last blush when a fresh round of blood rushed to his cheeks.

"What if that's not allowed here," Naruto asked after many long moments.

Sasuke shrugged. "It's just a word."

Naruto nodded still studying Sasuke thoughtfully.

"We'll be like you and Sakura," Sasuke finally said.

"Huh?"

"Well, you think of each other as siblings, right?"

"Yes," Naruto nodded.

"What are the odds that the Haruno's are going to adopt you and make it legal?"

Naruto smiled, finally understanding. "None whatsoever."

"So it's just a word," Sasuke put his hand over his heart, "to express the feelings here."

"Feelings," Naruto covered Sasuke's hand, "like love?"

"Like love," Sasuke confirmed.

+++

Sasuke rested his head on Naruto's thigh as they sat in comfortable silence and watched a ray of the morning sun inch across the wall. When another ray reached Naruto's hair, wreathing his face in an unearthly glow, Sasuke chided himself for thinking of angels.

Naruto must have felt the attention because he looked down at Sasuke. Then he smiled and Sasuke felt a funny quiver in his stomach and his heart beat with a heavy thump. Blinded by the vision, he didn't realize the words flowing from his mouth.

"I don't even recognize myself anymore. I keep having these thoughts of curling up at your feet in an obedient, needy, besotted little ball. My new goal, the thing I could live for, would drive my days, would be your smile."

+++

"There?"

Sasuke's breath hitched as Naruto made tiny little movements with his hips, brushing that one spot, over and over.

"Th…ah…there." Sasuke squeezed his eyes shut and dug his nails into Naruto's shoulders.

"Like that?" Naruto murmured around the earlobe between his lips.

"Ah...fu…ah," Sasuke panted incoherently.

"Look at me."

Sasuke opened his eyes and looked. Coherent thought was shattered, the pieces cast into the ocean of glittering blue and golden sunshine above him.

The sounds of the morning, the scents of many hours of lovemaking, the warmth and color of the light creeping into the room, all coalesced and thickened around them. And in the expanse between dark eyes and blue, Sasuke heard unspoken promises and questions.

_"I am yours. Forever. Will you be mine? Will you commit your life to me?"_

Though Naruto's lips had not moved with these words, Sasuke knew that they hung there between them.

"Yes. Always. Yes."

And though Sasuke's feet had been in Konoha for eight long months, now, at last, his heart was here as well.

**Author's Note:**

> Epilogue
> 
> Sasuke walked alongside Naruto.
> 
> It was a beautiful day. The most beautiful day he'd ever seen. He didn't know why he'd never noticed it in his travels before, but, in fact, Konoha was the most beautiful village in all the five great nations. Why, he wondered, was the sky bluer here? Why was the sun brighter, the scents on the breeze sweeter?
> 
> It was still the most beautiful place on earth when a group of teenage academy students dropped into their path.
> 
> "You gonna wipe the pavement with this loser, Uchiha-san?" One teen sniggered as others high-fived each other and laughed loudly.
> 
> Sasuke turned to Naruto, who turned and faced him in response, an unreadable look on his face.  
> "Naru-bear?" Sasuke cocked his head. A tiny choked sound left Naruto, but his expression didn't change.
> 
> Sasuke stepped closer to Naruto and half of Konoha felt the adrenal surge in the slavering Chunins.
> 
> He draped his arms loosely around Naruto's neck and continued.
> 
> "These men are bothering me, tiger toes. Can you take care of them for me?"
> 
> "You mean these men, Sasu-bunny?"
> 
> Shrieks of alarm could be heard for blocks as thick vines sprouted out of the ground, winding around three of the red-faced teens, binding them and flipping them to dangle upside down.
> 
> "Uh huh." All six teens, dangling or otherwise, fell into stunned silence as Sasuke closed the distance completely. Then he tilted his head and showed all of Kohona that he and Naruto had settled their differences...and then some.
> 
>  
> 
> Disclaimer - I own nothing in the world of Naruto except my Kyuubi keychain.


End file.
